I Don't Have No Babies......

>> Saturday, August 16

"I don't know what he's packing balls or a vajayjay but, he needs to work that out cuz' I ain't got no babies, ain't nobody sucking on my titties, so please man the f@$k up."
- Terri from Project Runway

When I heard Ms. Terri on Project Runway utter these words I literally fell out of my chair in waves of laughter and tears. That was hilarious and awesome on so many levels. Girl, you better stop before my stomach hurts from laughing at your foolishness!

Later on as I was allowing the words to soak in I realized that I need to be the spokeswoman for the " I don't have no babies sucking on my titties, so he better man the **F@$k** up! Campaign" Just like Nancy Reagan had her "Just Say No" campaign, I have my own just say no campaign....Just Say No to men who can't man the **f@$k** up!!!! The campaign applies to both heterosexual and homosexual men. I don't care what you color you paint your pictures with but a man is still a man. I know a couple of dudes that can be my poster children (and I do mean children); they proudly wear the title of man-child well, so they should feel right at home.

Why is it that men feel that women should be the second coming of of their mothers, nannies, baby sitters, secretaries, personal assistant, chef, laundress, doctor, lawyer, and even wet nurses? I am no ones mama and certainly am not anyone's personal assistant. You are not Diddy and I don't want to work for you not unless you are paying and I'm talking seriously paying well, plus benefits and a 401k plan.

I just don't get the modern man these days. Have mothers coddled them too much from birth to adulthood? Have we sheltered them to the extent that when they get in the real world and meet real women they resort back to 5 year olds? You know what I'm not even going to insult 5 year olds like that because I know a few that have more sense than these grown ass fools, we have today.

Ladies, here is a list of red flag warnings that you may need to break camp because your man may need to man the **f@$k** up.......

If you have additions that you'd like to add to the list let me know and I'll update the list.

1. If he won't and can't help you with housework and he is the one creating all of the mess.....He might need to man the **F@$K** up

2. If he can't follow basic directions such as pick your clothes up off the floor the hamper is two steps away or watch the turkey in the oven ........He might need to man the **F@$K** up

3. If he considers washing the dishes as just rinsing them in hot water clean.......He might need to man the **F@$K** up

4. If he thinks cooking a meal, whether it be shake and bake or a nine course meal, is for suckers.......He might need to man the **F@$K** up (Hell, I'll even take fast food and I don't even like fast food, at least you thought about me)

5. If he chooses video games over spending quality time with you........He might need to man the **F@$K** up

6. If he says all of your interests and hobbies are whack.........He might need to man the **F@$K** up

7. If your dude has the schedule of a newborn (sleep, crap and eat on continuous cycle).......He might need to man the **F@$K** up

8. If your man is only interested in talking about himself and in the third person......He might need to man the **F@$K** up

9. If your man is the most outspoken person at home but gets around company, your friends and the public and acts likes Forest Gump on crack....He might need to man the **F@$K** up

10. If he can't be commited to you after x amount of years, much less say the word commitment.....He might need to man the **F@$K** up (in fact you BOTH need to man the F@$K up)


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